Rha is always in conversations with people about their dreams, purpose and ambition. She always pushes people to understand what it means to have success. People’s stories are the most valuable assets that they have. When you consider how what you have to offer is important, your story is a central part of what you have to bring. As you consider your story, it is important to have a reverence for where you came from. An appreciation for your roots is the foundation of your story.
As you consider your journey to success, consider how what you have been given regarding success dictates your actions. The degree to which you are conscious and aware of the messages you have received influences your perceptions. If you are looking to achieve success, these are the things that become important in terms of agreements that you make with yourself. The caliber of these agreements don’t change. The articulation may change, but the essence of these agreements remain steadfast.
These agreements come from years of Rha engaging with people who have success. There is a caveat: some people have stuff and some people have success. There is a difference between assets and success. Success is something deeper. Rha often hears, “can I be successful and can I really do it on my terms?” Am I allowed to define success on my own terms? Society has a general way that it sees and experiences success. People within society may have different definitions of success. This can lead an individual to wonder:
Will my definition of success be respected? Will I be seen as successful even if I don’t conform to the general expectations of money, material things, dominance and influence? Could admiration or acknowledgement come from the way that I want to define success? The next question people grapple with is: once I define success, can I pursue it in my own way? Can I find success in a way that doesn’t cause me to: ...contort in ways that are painful? ...trade off in ways that are costly? ...let go of things that matter to me?
Whether success will happen and whether it will be free from regrets is important as you approach pursuing your dreams on your terms. We can look at someone who has the things that we want to have or do the things that we want to do, we have an internal struggle as we wonder what they have done to get to where they are.
Rha’s experience with people who are truly and authentically successful is that there are four core commitments that they live by. This makes up their moral compass. This is the foundation from which they live and move and have their being in the world. These guide the things that they say yes to versus the things that they say no to. They guide the kind of environment they live in.
Be true to who you really are. Successful people have a clarity about what their values are a conviction to honor those values. People follow your cues, so if you demonstrate a reverence for what you value, whether or not people agree with it there is a greater opportunity that they, too, will respect your values.
Leverage your talents, gifts and abilities. Successful people are interested in being useful. They share in a way that represents excellence. They are committed to the highest possible standards in terms of their efforts and the outcomes of their activities. Goals and aspirations are rooted in how they will leverage their unique talents, gifts and abilities.
Do work that is meaningful. Whether this is related to neighborhood, family, spiritual community or elsewhere, they do work that has value for them. There is no disconnect between what they do for a living and what they think is important. They do work that has an impact not only on their own lives but some form of impact in the world.
Surround yourself with good people. Be around people who are authentic, real and who operate in concert with their own values. They are conscious about who they spend their energy with and who they develop relationships with. They are particular and meticulous about this. These four commitments create a foundation for success. Successful people are actively and consciously managing these four commitments all of the time.
This practice supports your ability to achieve success on your own terms. Once you’ve defined success and activated these four commitments, the next step is to look at your practices. These are the things that you do consistently that move you toward what you want to achieve and who you want to be. CLARITY The first part of the practice is clarity. Get clear about:
ALIGNMENT The second part of the practice is alignment. Once you are clear about who you are, you show up in a way that aligns with your values. Clarity and alignment will help you assess whether your activities are effective in helping you meet your goals. These dual elements help you call forth the highest and best of what you have to offer.
You will need to negotiate and trade off and navigate many decisions. Maybe you are at a job today that doesn’t feed you but it pays the bills. Today, then, you start to look at your long-term vision and decide what ways you can shift to do what you ultimately want to do. This will enable you every day to bring your strongest offering to the game.
Alignment analysis is the same process: does what you are doing line up with the difference you want to make? Are the results you are producing moving the needle on what you say is important? Clarity will lastly drive alignment about your relationships. As you look at the people you surround yourself with, you have to do the courageous work of bringing yourself into full harmony and say yes or no to each relationship.
REALIGNMENT The third part of the practice is realignment. Once you get in alignment, there is a risk of being thrown off by distractions and compromises in life. Realignment, then, has to be a constant practice. Situations and circumstances take you out of alignment. Consistently bringing yourself back into alignment is an essential part of these practices. Bring yourself back home and into the truth of who you really are.
If you honor these four commitments and engage in these practices, you will find success. You may think the work is to start a coaching practice, launch a product, get on a bestseller list, but the real work is harmony. If you engage with the work and see this powerful practice, success becomes inevitable for you. All of a sudden, opportunities will show up.
These are outgrowths or fruits of the internal labor. Success is no longer an external experience that you are reaching for outside of yourself. Success is an internal proposition. When you get in alignment with yourself, all of the other opportunities begin to show up. You have to trust the value of being you. Your homework is to work on the four commitments. Do some internal inventory and ask yourself some questions:
Once you align yourself with the four commitments, you can decide which aspect of the practice is most important for you. When you begin to do this, how will your life and relationships start to shift? What is your level of happiness? As you step into this, where will happiness and fulfillment show up as a result? What other fruit shows up, such as money or recognition?
You have the opportunity to pay attention as you apply these practices. Rha’s special gift to you as you engage with these ideas is the solutions to the three problems that she hears most frequently. These free video trainings will address:
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